On July 10, I was visited by a series of phantasms. It was like Dickens A Christmas Carol except it was hot as balls and the child labor was outsourced to China.
Everybody thinks Phantasm #1 is the one to watch out for but he’s really a pussycat. He’s into fashion and posing and he’s a sweet, decent man with slightly twisted sexual proclivities, but once you get used to those he’s a prince.. Just don’t correct his accent when he attempts Portuguese because he has been studying it for over a year and the Brazilians and the Portuguese, it’s like they’re speaking two totally different languages and it’s got him totally fucked.
#2, on the other hand, will actually kill you as soon as look at you. That thing in his eye? It’s no mistake. He started working on that when he was in the playpen. If, and when, he eats you, it won’t be the first human flesh he’s tasted.
He’s never stopped looking because he can’t stop looking. He has no eyelids. I blame the wielder of the pen for that. But we all blame who we prefer to blame. In the words of Opus, “I prefer to blame…..Congress.”